The Geek Biker

Rambles of a geek that rides a bike

Monthly Archives: May 2010

Facebook statuses – another rant

I have many a rant to rave about when it comes to facebook. Where to start….

In fact it probably started with Friendster and Myspace…I only joined Myspace to see what the hype is about. Then realised it is a relative fun way to keep in touch and up to date with your friends.

All of a sudden facebook appeared and everybody did the ol’ switcheroo….why? Apparently Myspace is too difficult to set up and too difficult to maintain. REALLY??? Since all the friends switched,  there was no point in keeping my Myspace account up to date. Now we are all stuck with the same old boring facebook. The white pages of death by boredom.

Since facebook is so utterly dull, everyone feels inclined to add status updates that makes no sense or only sense to them to entertain the masses. What do you mean, “doesn’t make sense” you hypocrite. Lets take a few examples and rip it out of proportion. And I can rip it to shreds because as you’ll see, none of the statuses where ever in context to start off with.  “John Doe is waiting for”. That is it…nothing more, nothing less. And I’m not the type of guy to go comment “waiting for what john????” because I don’t care.

So next he would post something like “John Doe is walking backwards.” Who gives a flying F which way you are walking backwards or is it supposed to mean something? Means diddly squat to me. So am I supposed to decipher the meaning? How about adding a cypher key??? If it was something along the lines of “John Doe is walking backwards because my car broke down and I have to pull it with a rope”. I would say…ok….but why are you putting a facebook update while pulling a car. A simple Productivity Graph would show that you will pull your car further if you are not using facebook at the same time. So how about you push the car and use the rope to hang yourself afterwards. What about this one (I know you have seen it before) “I’m going to change it”….change what??? Your hair colour, your sex.

Yes, it is the wrong way around!

Insert Random Facebook picture (that does not make sense) here

So I also started (continued) putting useless status updates on facebook….but if you know me, then you will know that I’m a lazy bugger who can’t think of anything useless/useful to say. So I turned to Generatus. With comments like:

  • TvZ is boldly trying out a new font
  • TvZ is telling a lack of pies
  • TvZ always forgives his enemies – nothing annoys them so much.
  • TvZ is so fat that when he jumped in the ocean, whales started singing “We are Family!”

So that is where I’m at with that. Useless status updates till the end.

Interesting Blog

I’m quite the fan of xkcd and today I saw this strip:

I get the humour, but I have to reiterate: I don’t care.

Fake game names

It is about time I put something up here about games again

To start off I would like to point out that there can probably not be something like a fake game name…right? If the game was made and it had a name…then that is the game’s name…So it can’t be fake.

But what if the game name does not represent the actual features, game play or anything about the game.

Lets go back ages (1986) when Arkanoid was released. I get it. The name comes from the mother ship that the “Vaus” scrambled away. So you control a UFO and bump some kind of space ball against space bricks. And at the end (level 33) you beat a “boss”. So…erm…nothing to do with Arkenoid right? Why not call the game “Vaus” or “UFO dodge ball”?

Let us not linger in the past. Why not turn to something more recent…recent being two years ago.

Without thinking or reading reviews I bought the game Legendary. Without a doubt one of the shit’iest games I ever played. The only thing “legendary” about it was how legendary shit it was. To be fair. I liked the concept/idea of the game, but not the game at all. And after a frustrating gaming experience, I decided to try the multiplayer. O dear…. Either no one wanted to play against/with me or I was the only fool on the internet with the game. No games existed….at all.

Why not talk about everyone’s beloved Italian plumber… ever heard about Super Mario 64? Was Mario 64 at that time? No… because he jumps to high for a 64 year old. I know, I know, the game was developed for the Nintendo 64.  But why is he Super then? That is why I thought it must have had something to do with his age. Because only a Super 64 year old can jump so high and eat so many mushrooms at the same time. Why not go with the original name like in the first Donkey Kong? Jumpman! Than explains everything about him! I have never seen Mario play a game of Pipe Mania or fix one broken pipe in Mushroom Kingdom. Except if his job as a plumber is only to clean the weeds from the underground pipes and kill all wildlife in the kingdom.

Avatar-Shmavatar!!!

A while ago I wrote a simple little blog about 3D movies and how awesome (yes I did just use the word awesome) it is going to be. In Rave, Rant and Review (I hate rave, really hate it…but not holding it against the blogger 😉 )the blogger even wrote about 3D porn. Not that I haven’t thought about it, I was just waiting for someone else to mention it. A few months went by and Avatar made its appearance. I watched it and thoroughly enjoyed the 3D experience. The storyline was shite but that is a whole different discussion all together.

Now the blueray discs are being sold…and I’m forced to relive the blue faces of the Navi to such an extent that it is irritating my eyes and I want to use a pitch fork to correct my vision. The Nine network here in Oz decided it would be “grand” to take every c-grade celebrity to have a little chat about Avatar while we are watching the naked blue beings run around and yelling high pitched noises.

Then I saw to my great dismay that Gizmodo (the geeky bog I came to love) has sold its soul to the blueish devils and the whole blog skin is Avatar related. Take a look at this (no photoshop involved) screenshot:

Sad… I know….